Blackjack Jokes: Winner winner chicken dinner, this term popularized the black jack game like nothing else. All hails to Kevin spacey and the entire cast of movie ‘21’. Without wasting another moment, let’s hop on to the crunchiest blackjack jokes that will give your laughter at least 21 times.
Best Blackjack Jokes
Why are pedophiles terrible Blackjack players?
They don’t hit on anything over 14.
I played poker at a casino that was out of toilet paper. I had shitty hands the rest of the night.
Why can’t Kevin Spacey win at blackjack (despite his role in “21”
He keeps hitting on 17.
A Blackjack dealer is arrested for pedophilia…
He will hit on anything 16 and under.
Why aren’t there any casinos in Africa? Because there are too many cheetahs (cheaters).
Hiring out of work Blackjack dealers to count ballots in Nevada was not a good idea.
They count up to 22, reshuffle the stack, and start over.
My blackjack game is a lot like my sex life.
I always hit on nothing.
What’s it called when a couple of cows are playing poker in a penthouse casino? High steaks.
Girls are like blackjack….
I’m always going for 21, but end up hitting 16.
Which company NEVER loses at blackjack?
Forever 21.
Why do 2 bit gamblers never win at blackjack ?
Because they can only count to 3.
What did the gambling addicts name their daughter?
Betty.
Dating is a lot like Blackjack:
While 21 is the ideal, with 14 or below you are definitely gonna hit it.
A 17 in blackjack is like a mother in law
Sometimes you want to hit it, but it’s probably smarter not to.
Blackjack is just like my love life
I always hit on 15
You know why I love blackjack?
because I can hit on sweet sixteen!
Marriage is like blackjack. You can either hit or stay, but you can’t do both.
Why do old women make terrible blackjack players?
Because nobody can hit them.
I pulled 5 cards blindly and got a royal straight flush
I was soo happy until i realise i was playing blackjack.
A blackjack dealer left his wife behind at their marriage counseling appointment…
he just couldn’t deal with it anymore
What do Dating & Blackjack Have In Common?
I always hit on a soft twelve.
Kevin Spacey is trying to get a new position in Vegas,…
Blackjack Dealer. Because they hit on anything under 17
Just Heard about the man who needed to use his fingers and toes to count to 20?
He was thrown out of the casino when he pulled his pants down while playing blackjack
I play women like I play Blackjack
I know I should be aiming for 21 but I always end up hitting on 17.
Did you hear about the fish that played blackjack?
The smelt. It dealt it.
Hear about the man who needed to use his fingers and toes to count to 20?
He was thrown out of the casino when he pulled his pants down while playing blackjack
I took my masochistic girlfriend to the casino, but she lost all my money.
She kept screaming “Hit me!” at the blackjack table.
I lost my friends after a heated game of Blackjack.
In hindsight, improvising with a Tarot deck was probably a bad idea.
I once got arrested for playing blackjack on a construction crane
Apparently the police doesn’t like high-jacking.
Why wouldn’t R. Kelly make a good blackjack dealer?
He hits on 14.
I didn’t realize I was addicted to blackjack…
Until I turned 21.
They say one in every seven friends has a gambling addiction. My money’s on Jason.
Why don’t vampires like gambling? They get nervous when the stakes are raised.
The BJ player said, “When I get bad cards, it’s not the blackjack dealer’s fault. Accordingly, when I get good cards, the blackjack dealer obviously had nothing to do with it so, why should I tip him?”
I did well at strip poker the other night. I played my socks off.
Chuck Norris won the World Series of Poker using Pokémon cards.
There is a very easy way to return from a casino with a small fortune: go there with a large one.
What did the masochist say to the blackjack dealer?
Hit me with 21