Snake puns and jokes make use of clever wordplay involving our slithery, scaly friends. Though often portrayed as villains in popular culture, snakes can actually inspire quite amusing humor. From harmless garden snakes to giant anacondas, these legless reptiles crawl their way into our jokes and punchlines. Funny snake puns take advantage of the long “s” sound snakes make, turning average words into silly snake-themed laughs.
Whether it’s a snake searching for a pair of shoes, crossing the street, or getting scolded by its mother, the imagery itself can induce giggles. Snake jokes also poke fun at these creatures’ unique physical features – their lack of arms and propensity to eat bizarre meals whole. Though simplistic, a well-delivered snake pun tickles our funny bone. The endless possibilities of snake-based wordplay and the flexible nature of their bodies provide amusing fodder for laughs. So let’s slither our way into learning more about these funny, fang-tastic snake puns!
Funny Snake Puns
Why did the snake go to school? To improve his hiss-tory knowledge!
What do you call a snake that’s 3.14 meters long? A π-thon!
Why don’t snakes ever argue? They like to avoid hiss-terical situations.
How do you make a snake laugh? Tell it a funny tail!
What do you call a snake that’s exactly 3 feet long? A yard snake!
Did you hear about the snake who became a math professor? He’s a real adder-all expert.
What do you get when you cross a snake with a pie? A python!
Why did the snake become a locksmith? Because he had a great knack for hiss-ting locks!
What do you call a snake that’s a great musician? A hiss-terpreter!
What did one snake say to the other during a race? “Ready, set, hiss!”
Why did the snake break up with the measuring tape? Because it found someone more flexible!
What did the snake say to the naughty lizard? “You need a reptile dysfunction!”
How do you comfort a nervous snake? Hiss-teria therapy!
What’s a snake’s favorite subject in school? Hiss-tory, of course!
What do you call a snake that’s good at making pottery? A ceramic python!
Why don’t snakes use cell phones? Because they don’t have good reception in the grass!
Did you hear about the snake who became a weather reporter? He’s great at predicting “ssss-sunny” days!
What do you call a snake that’s always telling jokes? A hiss-terical comedian!
What did the snake give to his girlfriend? A goodnight hiss!
Why did the snake go to the car dealership? He wanted to buy a new “ssss-sedan.”
What do you call a snake that’s a master of disguise? A chameleon!
What did the snake say to the bee? “Buzz off, I’m not your type!”
Why did the snake apply for a job at the bakery? He wanted to work the snake-ery department!
What do you call a snake that’s a skilled artist? A picassssso!
Why did the snake become a fashion designer? Because he knows how to slither into style!
What do you call a snake with a great sense of humor? A hiss-ter!
How did the snake propose to his girlfriend? With a “ring-sneck!”
Why did the snake bring a ladder to the bar? Because he heard the drinks were on the house!
What do you call a snake that plays the guitar? A “rattle” and strum musician!
What do you call a snake that loves spicy food? A “hiss-pacho” connoisseur!
Why don’t snakes play hide and seek with frogs? Because they always croak under pressure!
What do you call a snake that’s a computer expert? A python programmer!
Why was the snake always happy? Because he had a great “rattlesnake”!
What did the snake say to the lizard when he lost his keys? “Don’t worry, I can sss-scale the wall!”
What’s a snake’s favorite dessert? Mice cream!
Why don’t snakes ever get lost? Because they always find their way with their “venom” GPS!
What do you call a snake that’s a great dancer? A “cobra” dancer!
Why did the snake apply for a job as a gardener? Because he heard it was a “ssss-sprouting” career!
What do you call a snake that’s a talented actor? A “stage viper”!
How do you organize a snake party? You send out “ssss-invitations”!
Why did the snake bring a suitcase to the zoo? Because he wanted to pack his lunch!
What’s a snake’s favorite part of a joke? The “punch-line”!
What do you call a snake that’s an expert in chemistry? A “venom-ist”!
Why did the snake become a chef? Because he wanted to make “ssss-izzling” dishes!
What do you call a snake that’s good at math? An “adder”!
Why was the snake a great baseball player? Because he had a mean “curve”!
What did the snake use to fix his computer? His “snake byte”!
Why did the snake apply for a job at the zoo’s gift shop? Because he wanted to work in “ssss-ales”!
What do you call a snake that’s a lawyer? A “venom-ous” advocate!
Why did the snake take up yoga? To improve his “cobra” pose!
Hilarious Snake Jokes
What do you call a snake that works for the government? A civil serpent!
Why was the snake hired as a detective? Because he was good at snake investigations.
What do you call a snake that likes to dig holes? An exca-viper!
Why did the snake cross the road? To get to the other side.
What do you call a snake that sells cars? A used hiss salesman.
Why did the snake wear smelly shoes? Because he had reptiles on his feet!
What do you call a snake that helps you fix your car? A me-cobra-nic!
Why are snakes bad at playing baseball? They don’t have arms!
What did the mama snake say to her baby? Time for sssschool!
What do you call a happy snake? A ssssmiley sssserpent!
Why was the snake late for dinner? He got caught in a rattle jam.
What do you call a snake that lives in a spaceship? An astro-viper!
Why did the snake cross the camping ground? To get to the other sssside.
What do you call a snake that works at a hotel? A bell-boa constrictor!
Why did the snake take the elevator? He was afraid of sssstairs.
What do you call a snake who is a really good dancer? An ana-conda shakira!
Why did the snake get detention? For talking too much in classss.
What do you call a snake who loves sweets? A licorice viper!
Why are snakes such picky eaters? They don’t like anything but reptiles.
What do you call a snake who works in an office? A pen and paper python!
Why was the snake athlete so flexible? Because he did yoga every morning!
What do you call a snake that lives in the Arctic? An ice viper!
Why did the snake cross the road, turn around and cross again? Because he was a double crosser!
What do you call a snake that likes music? A rock and roll rattler!
Why did the snake get in trouble with the law? For impersoonating a police officer!
What do you call a snake who loves donuts? A slider!
Why are snakes bad at sending text messages? They can’t hold the phone!
What do you call a snake who works as a scientist? An exsserperimental phython!
Why did the snake cross the playground? To get to the ssslide on the other ssside!
What do you call a snake that works as a cook? A chef boa constrictor!
Why was the snake hungry after eating a big meal? Because snakes can never get full!
What do you call a snake who does magic tricks? A Houdini python!
Why did the snake cross the road and disappear? Because he was a vanishing viper!
What do you call a snake that rides the bus? A metro-boa constrictor!
Why did the snake buy a harp? He wanted to play ssscales!
What do you call snakes who form a band? Adders that rock!
Why are snakes never afraid? They have cold blood!
What do you call a snake who works on a ship? An admiral snake!
Why did the snake lose the race? He ran out of him-power!
What do you call a snake who is a talented singer? A sssipper!
What do you call a snake that is also a wizard? A Hairy Pottered python!
Why don’t snakes use computers? They can’t afford a laptop!
What do you call a snake who loves watching movies? A film buff-boa!
Why did the snake cross the road, turn around and cross again? Because he was a double crosser!
What do you call a snake who works as a judge? A ssslitherin!
Why are snakes never afraid? They have cold blood!
What do you call a psychic snake? A fortune teller constrictor!
Why was the snake crying? Because he was a boa consssstrictor!
What do you call a snake that loves cheese? A cheedar rattler!
Why was the snake wearing sunglasses? To look sssuper cool!
Funny One Liners on Snake
Why did the snake cross the road? To get to the other side (of course), but also to get away from the cobra who kept calling him a worm.
What’s the difference between a snake and a politician? A snake can keep its tongue straight when it’s forked.
What do you call a snake that’s always getting into trouble? A slitherin’ delinquent.
What do you call a snake with a PhD? A doctor of herpetology.
What do you call a snake that’s always on time? A punctual python.
What do you call a snake that’s always cold? A chilly python.
What do you call a snake that’s always telling jokes? A slithering stand-up comedian.
What do you call a snake that’s always trying to get ahead? A climbing cobra.
What do you call a snake that’s always trying to make new friends? A friendly garter snake.
What do you call a snake that’s always trying to stay healthy? A fitness fanatic python.
What do you call a snake that’s always trying to save money? A frugal rattlesnake.
What do you call a snake that’s always trying to be more fashionable? A stylish sidewinder.
What do you call a snake that’s always trying to be more sophisticated? A cultured coral snake.
What do you call a snake that’s always trying to be more intelligent? A wise water snake.
What do you call a snake that’s always trying to be more brave? A courageous copperhead.
What do you call a snake that’s always trying to be more kind? A benevolent black mamba.