Buckle up, folks, ’cause we’re about to take you all through the roller coaster ride of the world of speed limit jokes! Prepare yourself thoroughly to laugh your socks off as we break all the barriers (and maybe a few laws) with these turbo-charged chucklers. So fasten your seatbelts and get ready for a comedy cruise where speed limits are meant to be broken and laughter knows no bounds with our funnier than everything else speed limit jokes!
Funny Speed Limit Jokes
What do you call a snail who’s speeding? A shell-y driver!
Why did the turtle cross the road? To get to the other side of the speed limit!
What’s the difference between a speed limit and a turtle? A speed limit is a suggestion, and a turtle is a turtle.
I once saw a sign that said “Speed limit enforced by aircraft.”
I’m pretty sure if you’re getting pulled over by an F-16, you deserve to be driving that fast.
Kid flys by a sitting cop car in excess of the speed limit.
Of course the cop chases him and stops him. With a big grin on his face the cop says I’ve been waiting for you all morning.
And the kid says, ” well I got here as fast as I could.”
President Trump announces plan to limit Highway Speed Limit of 55 Miles per Hour
He wants to Make America Late Again
What do you call a car that’s always speeding? A ticket magnet!
Why did the cop pull over the snail? He was driving under the shell-ocity limit!
What do you call a snail that goes 20 mph? A late snail.
An American guy was pulled over on a highway in Canada…
The cop said “Do you know how fast you were going?!”
The American guy said “I’m not sure why you’re even pulling me over, but yes, I was doing 110 – just like the speed limit sign says.”
What’s the difference between the universe and a German Autobahn (highway)?
The universe has a speed limit
Me: As I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to feel that 60 is the new 30.
Policeman: I don’t care what you “feel”, buster, 30 is the speed limit!
What do you call a turtle that goes 30 mph? A fast turtle.
What do you call a police officer that goes 20 mph? A bored police officer.
What do you call a police officer that goes 30 mph? A reckless police officer.
An old man got pulled over for going over the speed limit.
Officer : Do you know why i pulled you over?
Old man: Obviously because I’m late delivering these donuts.
Wife: Slow down! you’re going 20 over the speed limit!
Husband: you’re going just as fast as I am…
I heard someone say “Fcuk the speed limit” in Alabama
As a Physics student, I realized that speed is relative.
What do you call a speed limit sign that says 20 mph? A sign that is begging to be ignored.
What do you call a speed limit sign that says 30 mph? A sign that is asking for trouble.
Why did the snail get a speeding ticket?
An electron is breaking the speed limit going along a motorway…
…When he is pulled over by a Proton. Proton: do you know how fast you were going?
Electron: yes, but now I have no clue as to where I am.
i’ll never understand people who get in the fast lane just to drive the speed limit.
this lane is for CRIME
why is 68 the speed limit for women in bed?
At 69 they blow a rod.
He was going too slow.
What do you call a snail that goes 20 mph?
A fast snail.
What do you call a snail that goes 30 mph?
A speeding snail.
You have to wonder about the people who go 10 miles below the speed limit.
How did they get so far underground?
What do you call a snail that goes 40 mph?
A snail with a turbo charger.
What do you call a snail that goes 50 mph?
A snail that’s late for work.
What do you call a snail that goes 60 mph?
A snail that’s on fire.
What do you call a snail that goes 70 mph?
A snail that’s about to explode.
What do you call a snail that goes 80 mph?
A snail that’s in a hurry to get to the finish line.
What do you call a snail that goes 90 mph?
A snail that’s on a mission.
What do you call a snail that goes 100 mph?
A snail that’s not a snail anymore. It’s a rocket.