Sloths are known for being incredibly slow, relaxed animals who spend most of their time hanging out in trees. Their languid, laidback lifestyle makes them the perfect subject for funny puns and jokes. Sloth puns play on sloths’ notoriously sluggish nature by showing them doing everything at an absurdly slow pace or being late and lazy in humorous situations. Puns like “What do you call a sloth who moves really slow?
A snail’s pace!” and “Why was the sloth tired when he got home? He had a hard daze night.” highlight the sloth’s trademark slowness. Sloth puns remind us to relax, take our time, and appreciate a slower pace of life. The sloth’s extreme mellowness allows us to gently poke fun and craft puns around their lovable languor and lethargy. Whether it’s a “slow train” or “slothfully” doing things, sloth puns leisurely make us smile.
Funny Sloth Puns
What do you call a sloth that moves really slow? A snail’s pace!
Why was the sloth late for work? He took his time getting there.
Why are sloths bad at playing hide and seek? They’re always found hanging around.
How does a sloth get down from a tree? They leaf it there.
What do you call a sloth who does everything slowly? A slow-mo.
Why don’t sloths make good sailors? They can’t stand being on the high seas.
What do you call a slow sloth? A slothematician.
Why don’t sloths make good judges? They take too long to make decisions.
What do you call a sloth in a hurry? An oxymoron.
Why can’t sloths be star athletes? They don’t move fast enough.
What do you call a three-toed sloth? Laid back.
Why was the sloth tired when he got home? He had a hard daze night.
How does a sloth prefer to travel? On the slow train.
Why are sloths so calm? They like to take things slothfully.
What’s a sloth’s favorite drink? Slow gin fizz.
Why don’t sloths make good Uber drivers? They drive too slowly.
What’s a sloth’s favorite mode of transportation? A slowcycle.
Why are sloths so relaxed? They don’t want to work themselves into a tizzy.
What do you call a sloth who did well on an exam? A slo-genius.
How does a sloth prefer to send mail? Snail mail.
Why do sloths make bad TV reporters? They deliver the news too slowly.
What’s a sloth’s favorite song? “Slow Ride” by Foghat.
Why do sloths make terrible construction workers? They take forevers to get anything done.
What’s a sloth’s favorite magazine? Sloth Enthusiast Weekly.
Why did the sloth get fired from the calendar factory? He took too many days off.
What’s a sloth’s favorite dessert? Slow-churned ice cream.
Why can’t sloths be politicians? They never get anything done quickly.
What do you call a lazy baby sloth? A slacker.
Why did the sloth cross the road? To get to the other sigh.
What do you call a speedy sloth? An oxymoron.
What do you call a sloth who shows you around? A tour guide.
Why are sloths so bad at basketball? They can’t dribble fast enough.
Why did the sloth climb to the top of the tree? To leaf through the branches.
Why do sloths make bad priests? Their sermons drag on forever.
What do you call a sloth who goes on vacation? A laid-back traveler.
Why did the sloth get fired from the sawmill? He took too long to cut the logs.
What’s a sloth’s favorite branch of science? Geoslowlogy.
Why are sloths so bad at karaoke? They take forever to sing the lyrics.
How does a sloth prefer to send letters? Sloth class mail.
What do you call a zippy sloth? A paradox.
Why couldn’t the sloth land a job as a DJ? His beats were too slow.
What kind of car does a sloth drive? A slothmobile.
Why do sloths make bad firefighters? They take too long to respond to emergencies.
What do you call a sloth who is punctual? An anomaly.
Why do sloths hate alarm clocks? They go off too quickly.
Why did the sloth open a savings account? To save up slowly over time.
What’s a sloth’s idea of speed dating? A 3-hour event.
How does a sloth listen to music? On sloth-forward.
Why was the sloth late to everything? He took too long getting reedy.
What do you call a fast sloth? Breaking the laws of physics.
Why do sloths excel at growing beards? Their hair grows so slowly.
What’s a sloth’s favorite car? A sloe ride.
Why do sloths prefer to be fashionably late? They move too slow to be on time.
What do you call a sloth who got held back a year? A slow learner.
Hilarious Sloth Jokes
Why did the sloth bring a ladder to the tree? Because it wanted to see what the ground looked like!
How do sloths pay for things? They use “slo-currency”!
What do you call a sloth that can play the piano? A slow jammer!
Why don’t sloths play hide and seek? Because they always get caught hanging around!
What did one sloth say to the other sloth on a rainy day? “Looks like we’re not going anywhere fast!”
Why did the sloth become a gardener? Because it was great at tree planting!
What do you call a sloth that picks pockets? A slow thief!
How do sloths stay cool in the summer? They use “slow-aris”!
What do you get when you cross a sloth and a kangaroo? A slow hopper!
Why did the sloth go to school? To improve its “slowlarship”!
What do sloths say when they answer the phone? “Heeelllooooooo?”
How do sloths write letters? They use “slo-script”!
Why did the sloth become a librarian? Because it loved “slo-reading”!
What do you call a sloth that’s a great dancer? A slow-motion dancer!
How do sloths make decisions? They take their time and use “slo-logic”!
Why did the sloth bring a backpack to the party? Because it heard there would be “slow dancing”!
What’s a sloth’s favorite game? “Snail and Seek”!
What’s a sloth’s favorite song? “I Will Always Hang on You”!
Why don’t sloths ever get stressed? Because they have “slo-chill”!
What did the sloth say when it won the race? “I didn’t rush, I sloshed!”
Why do sloths make terrible poker players? Because they always have a “slo-poker face”!
What’s a sloth’s favorite type of weather? Slo-shine!
What’s a sloth’s favorite type of music? Slo-rock!
How do you communicate with a sloth? Slo-o-o-wly!
Why did the sloth become a detective? Because it was great at “slo-ving” mysteries!
What do you call a sloth that’s always happy? A “slo-smiler”!
What’s a sloth’s favorite exercise? Slo-ga!
How do sloths send messages? They use “slo-mail”!
What did the sloth say when it crossed the road? “I don’t know, but it took forever!”
Why do sloths make terrible comedians? Because their jokes are always “slo-pokes”!
What’s a sloth’s favorite ice cream flavor? Slo-thberry!
What do you call a sloth that loves to travel? A “slo-globetrotter”!
Why did the sloth apply for a job at the bakery? Because it wanted to make “slo-dough”!
What’s a sloth’s favorite dance move? The “slo-mba”!
How do sloths apologize? They say, “I’m slo-sorry”!
Why did the sloth bring a stopwatch to the tree? Because it wanted to “slo-time”!
What do you get when you cross a sloth and a kangaroo? A “slo-hop”!
Why do sloths love the internet? Because it’s full of “slo-memes”!
What do you call a sloth that loves to sing? A “slo-rocker”!
Why did the sloth become a chef? Because it could make the most “slo-delicious” dishes!
What’s a sloth’s favorite board game? “Slo-ry!” (Sorry)
Why did the sloth go to the art gallery? Because it wanted to see some “slo-paintings”!
How do you throw a party for a sloth? You invite everyone and wait!
What do you call a sloth that’s a computer expert? A “slo-programmer”!
Why did the sloth bring a backpack to the zoo? Because it heard there would be “slo-sightseeing”!
What do you call a sloth that’s always late? A “slo-tardy”!
What’s a sloth’s favorite movie genre? “Slo-mance”!
How do sloths greet each other? They say, “Hi there, sloth-mate!”
Why did the sloth bring a pillow to the park? Because it wanted to have a “slo-ze”!
What’s a sloth’s favorite candy? “Slo-sweet”!
Funny One Liners on Sloth
What’s the sloth’s favorite day of the week? Nap-aturday.
What’s a sloth’s favorite sport? Hang gliding.
What’s a sloth’s favorite food? Anything that doesn’t require them to move.
What’s a sloth’s favorite movie? The Slow and the Furious.
What’s a sloth’s favorite song? “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing” by Aerosmith, but only the first verse.
Why did the sloth cross the road? To get to the other side, eventually.
What’s the sloth’s favorite holiday? Labor Day.
What’s the sloth’s favorite book? “Waiting for Godot.”
What’s the sloth’s favorite video game? “Grand Theft Auto,” but only the cheat mode where you can fly.
What’s the sloth’s favorite animal? Itself.
What’s the sloth’s favorite motto? “Don’t sweat the small stuff, and the big stuff isn’t worth sweating either.”
What’s the sloth’s favorite activity? Doing nothing.
What’s the sloth’s favorite superpower? The ability to stop time.
Sloths are so lazy, they need a nap to wake up from their nap.
Sloths are so slow, they take a year to blink.
Sloths are so laid-back, they’re horizontal.
Sloths are so chill, they’re hypothermic.
Sloths are so energy-efficient, they can power a small city with their metabolism.
Sloths are so zen, they’re already enlightened.
Sloths are so wise, they know that life is too short to stress out.
Sloths are so spiritual, they’re one with the universe.
Sloths are so perfect, they don’t need to change a thing.
Sloths are so cool, they’re the embodiment of chill.
Sloths are so cute, they’re beyond adorable.
Sloths are so awesome, they’re the spirit animal of lazy people everywhere.